About

How to Write an About page:

Step 1: Say something about your blog. Is your blog about foot-binding? If so, say so. This is your chance to attract readers. Readers like bright shiny objects so try to to dangle some on your about page.

Step 2: Identify yourself a bit, but use little to no nudity. Many people–especially Americans–are uncomfortable with nudity. It makes them giggle. Do you have kids? Let readers know if they are the human or goat kind. It will bring you closer.

Step 3: Include contact information. Expect soliticians for genetic materials. You can choose to accept or ignore.

Step 4: Watch the money start pouring in.

 

How to Submit to The Official How To Blog:

So you want to write for this award-winning blog known for its officialness? Congratulations to you. Follow these simple steps:

Step 1: Email The Official How To Blog at theofficialhowtoblog@gmail.com

Step 2: Flatter the creator of TOHTB in the email. Some suggestions: “You are so smart” “Is it hard to be so brilliant?” “Your how-to advice on folding fitted sheets changed my life,” etc.

Step 3: State what you would like to write about. Make sure it’s a how-to post. Simply stating “I want to write about the Harlem Shake” is not efficient. Instead state “I want to write How To Know The World is Over with a focus on the Harlem Shake.”

Step 4: Watch the money start pouring in.*

*There will be no money. If you know how to make money from blogging, please contact me immediately.